


Glass

by AJ_Vinyl



Category: Sanders Sides, Thomas Sanders
Genre: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Angst, Hurt/No Comfort, Oneshot, Roman-centric, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Yes you read that right, idk why but i'm sorry for this, inspiration is a fleet-footed mistress, multiple chapters maybe??, oh fgod oh fuck, roman angst because whaaat? i'm totally not projecting wdym, roman sanders angst, who knows honestly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:28:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23883787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AJ_Vinyl/pseuds/AJ_Vinyl
Summary: Roman can't let them see how fragile he is.
Comments: 7
Kudos: 102





	Glass

“Oh, I’m lovely, don’t you worry, dearest Thomas!”

It was a lie, and Roman knew it. But it wasn’t as if he could let them know, or else all of them would get worried and, honestly, he didn’t want that for anything.

He didn’t want them to know he was falling apart, every thought battering his self-esteem, collapsing into bed after spending a full day working himself to the point of exhaustion, hating the result, unable to get to sleep through stress over whether his work was good enough even though their standards were so, _so low-_

Okay, so it was a _fucking huge_ lie. So what? Roman had been through worse. Like when he used to insult Virgil on a daily basis (his stomach clenched painfully at the reminder) or the last time he’d forgotten to eat for a really long time (Patton had been so _scared_ , he remembered with a stab of self-loathing) or when he interrupted Logan’s work (he winced inside recalling the irritated snapping he got in return).

He’d been through that and only come out with the guilt, so surely he could manage here, right? Surely he could fake a smile as good as genuine. Even if nothing else, Roman was an actor, no matter how poor his attempts, and he would play his part until he could no longer.

“If you’re sure…” Thomas replied, and he shook himself out of it, flashing them all a dazzling grin. It seemed to convince them, or at least enough to leave it be, for the other Sides gave some form of acknowledgement. Roman let his shoulders drop just the slightest bit as he breathed out, trying not to let his relief show on his face.

“Anyways, I had an idea and decided to expand it a bit in my spare time,” Roman said, diverting the attention from his welfare. He snapped to conjure the layout of the concept in the air, and the others looked it over.

Virgil gave him a perplexed expression after he had seemingly read it through, stating aloud that the wording was confusing.

Logan told him, “Your plan for how this would potentially be laid out is extremely convoluted. How do you expect this to work?”

Patton tried for a gentler route. “You might wanna spend some more time on that so it’s less… scattered. Okay, kiddo?”

He couldn’t let them see how he broke a little more inside. No chance, or they’d only grow more upset with him. So Roman did what he always did: he plastered on a smile, nodded enthusiastically.

“Of course!” He declared, waving away the illusory plan into scarlet smoke. “I’ll use this afternoon to develop it, and come back tomorrow with a fresh new outlook.”

He’d spent last afternoon developing it. Actually, he’d spent the last sixteen hours developing it- he couldn’t remember the last time he’d managed more than two hours of sleep. The other Sides didn’t know that, though, and Roman was determined to keep it that way, indifferent to the cost. He had to make them believe he could do better. He had to keep up the act, or else his reputation would fail and then where would he be? Looked down upon, detested, maybe even replaced. He couldn’t risk that.

His non-figmented delegate nodded in reply, giving him a proud expression. It was false pride, pride placed in a mask that Roman never took off save for the confines of his room, but it was pride nonetheless. 

“I’m sure you can come up with something great, Ro,” Thomas said, trying to be reassuring.

 _I’m sure I’ll try... and fail,_ Roman thought with a bittersweet laugh in his inner thoughts. However, he just nodded back and did his best to look the energetic, confident Prince they all knew him to be.

“With that, I’ll be off, if that’s all that’s needed of me,” Roman said, adding his signature flourish to hide the way his stance fell with each passing second. The others all gave some word of agreement, and he beamed at them _(fake fake fake fake fake manipulator deceiver imposter poser liar fake-)_ before sinking to his room.

He didn’t bother changing, just barely reaching his bed and letting himself flop onto it, despite how his exhausted body gave a twinge of pain in protest.

He was _so, so_ tired, and yet, Roman knew it would be a long wait until sleep’s wings covered his weary eyes.


End file.
